The Secret of Good Relationships

The China Disneyland was inaugurated recently. One of the actions CEO Robert Iger took to push the deal, was to seek a personal relationship with China’s paramount leader, President Xi Jinping. On learning that Xi’s father, a revolutionary leader, had visited Disneyland in 1980, he pressed his staff to find a photograph. They found one which showed the President’s father, wearing a Mao suit, shaking hands with Mickey Mouse. Iger presented the photo to the leader as gift and a symbol of the partnership.

INSIGHT
Poor, peasant, privileged or president we all love to be made to feel special.

The Difficulty of Being Yourself

“I fight to be myself everyday in a world where we are constantly pressurised to be someone else” - Actor Kalki Koechlin in a statement about battling sexual abuse.

Insight
Man or woman, young or old, we are all of us constantly under pressure by our relationships, our workplace culture and society to be someone else. The boundaries we draw around each situation shifts in tune with our personal goals, life phase and perceived danger to our physical, mental and spiritual well being.

The Periodic Stock Take

“The important things in my life are my relationships and well-being, where I am going as a human being in my development mentally, emotionally and physically” - Cameron Diaz, Actress

Insight
The ebb and flow of our relationships and fortunes have an effect on our emotional and physical well-being and can either grow, or hinder our mental development. Are the changes transient, or are they permanent?  Are they controllable, or are they uncontrollable?
Taking time-off for a periodic stocktaking can prove useful.

Relationship Boundaries

Elizabeth Gilbert’s memoir Eat, Pray, Love became a bestseller, and from being an artiste living close to the bone, she found herself in possession of a giant pile of money. Feeling lucky and wanting to do something for her friends who still lived in poor circumstances,  she gave away a lot of money to them.  But by doing this, she found that in many cases, far from strengthening relationships, it actually spoilt them.

#MyLearning
Money, religion and politics are divisive. Best to keep them out of relationships, both at home and work.

Picture Source : Souleylo

Love Has Many Parts

When Anand Mahindra met Harvard collegemate Bill Gates for the first time, he complained, "Thanks to you, I am never going to look like a winner to my kids." Explaining the reason why, Mahindra says his daughter asked him who were the famous people at Harvard with him, and when he  enthusiastically responded, “Bill Gates” she put him down with,  ‘Jeez Dad! In comparison, what a loser you are.‘

#MyLearning
Love has many parts to it; respect, caring, honesty and trust. While all are important, a few maybe some degrees less than others, but the weight of the rest more than make up for the lack.

The Relationship Dance

"Love is not the only emotion felt between a mother and child.  The relationship is like a dance - sometimes you are close, sometimes you pull away;  there is passion, anger and forgiveness;  and much like a dance,  the relationship will end one day." - Anita Ratnam, Indian classical dancer.

#MyLearning
Every relationship goes through the motions of this very dance - whether personal or professional. While relationships with no expectations attached are the most lasting, it is good to occasionally reflect on what a relationship means to us - what emotional sustenance does it provide us?  Does it make me feel wanted? Does it give me joy and happiness? Does it insire and motivate?  And more such questions. The idea being not to treat the relationship a transaction,  but to make us aware of it's importance in our lives.

Picture: aninception.com